What to do if you get unfairly dismissed from a club

Practical tips for when you’ve got fired

1 – At the time

If you’ve been drinking or it’s late at night, remember tiredness and alcohol/drugs can warp the situation
Control your emotions until you get out of the building. You may need to be able to look back and show you acted with more dignity and composure than management and venue staff did if you are going to appeal etc. Letting your anger or upset be visible may weaken your hand
If possible: record any conversations without management knowledge or jeopardising your safety
Get any belongings you have in the changing room or ask a friend to get them for you. Don’t lose the money you’ve invested in your work gear as well as your job. If management refuses to let you, try and record that, if safe to do so
Be careful who you talk to from the venue about it (dancers, security, bar staff, DJs). You don’t know who will say what and even if someone has your back, the conversation may get warped as it gets recounted from person to person. This includes group chats – it’s best to assume anything you say in a dancer group chat may be seen by management
As soon as possible, make a note of what happened, the timeline, any previous conversations etc in case you want to get legal support etc

2 – Next day

Accept the emotional rollercoaster and feeling of being disorientated
Line up other work: contact other managers asap, reach out to collaborators for e.g. content creation, or look at some other kinds of quick money options (e.g. FUNemployed on Facebook for UK readers, which lists all kinds of one-off gigs, market research trials that don’t need prior experience)

3 – Then

If you decide to ask for your job back, rehearse what you are going to say, saying it in a professional, calm, collected way. Don’t talk to them when you are in lingerie and they are fully clothed – consider power dressing in civvie clothes when you come in. Have the conversation before the end of the night or either party has been drinking etc. Ask beforehand when a convenient time to talk would be
Consider talking to any regulars as they may want to help in a range of ways (not just sending you money), but bear in mind they might gossip so be strategic with what you share

4 – Risk prevention

1 – Your emotions may swing all over the place initially – reassure yourself if so and don’t expect too much from yourself after it’s just happened

There will be an initial period of shock – you may be immobilised or alternatively find your behaviour goes a little haywire
Allow some of this as you process the situation but don’t let it tip over into self-sabotage: set some limits, calling on an accountability buddy if necessary (e.g. ‘I’m going to veg for 2 days and then on Thurs I’ll meet xx for a coffee to brainstorm my next move”)
You may cycle through shame, grief, feeling invalidated or violated, with emotions changing as you process the situation
Label and acknowledge your feelings, whether to yourself or in a journal – you can literally say to yourself, “I notice I am feeling a lot of anger”
Deal with anger appropriately: remember it alters your thinking and rehearses the same thought loops so mentally label it, naming the feeling, do long slow breathes if that works for you, and get moving so you rebalance the stress hormones
Deal with depression appropriately: label it, know that it will pass, don’t let yourself get into depressive thinking styles e.g. all or nothing thinking (‘Bad things always happen to me’ ‘I’ll never be able to xyz again’ etc)
Move your body

2 – Acknowledge the lack of control and explanations

This is one of the hardest things to get your head around with these situations, so recognise that it may take some time for it to stop whirring around in your mind
You may never get an explanation so the more you practice acceptance of this the better. The emphasis here is on literally practicing: continually reminding yourself about letting go or allowing the situation to be as it is, each time you catch your mind wandering off into trying to work out why, or railing against not knowing why

2 – Financial anxiety might flare up

Generate a sense of agency and control:
- Brainstorm about alternative income streams or venues
- Reach out to your SWer friends and think of some mutually beneficial money-making schemes
- If necessary: cancel any costs (monthly subscriptions etc) that you can do without short term, and any costly social commitments
Reassure yourself
- Work out a plan should the worst-case scenario happen so that you can reassure yourself that you’ll be ok even if it does.
- Tell yourself it’s going to be ok even if you don’t believe it yet
- Try soothing gestures such as butterfly hugs etc

3 – Put boundaries around thinking about it.

Give your brain a break now and then – thinking our way out of problems only works so far
Get out and do things that have nothing to do with SW that also can help you feel more positive, calm and resourceful

4 – Get the right kind of support

Civvies may be good for distraction and loving care but might not fully understand what you’re going through
Draw strength from a SW community – join a union, find peer support groups, go to SWer collectives. You might feel isolated after suddenly being cut off from your work friends or IG community
Make sure conversations with SWers don’t fan your anger or frustration – try to make them helpful processing conversations (rather than aimless ranting) that help your emotions move on to somewhere more positive

5 – Channel your frustration, anger

Once you’ve got over the initial shock use any angry etc energy to your advantage e.g. apply yourself with extra vigour to learning a skill, tackling something you’ve been putting off, getting involved with some activism (provided it feels healthy to you)
Our industry is rife with wrong-headed infringements of human rights. For those that have the headspace, making change to counteract this can be helpful emotionally whether doing something on your own such as starting your own event etc, or joining an established activism group (for UK readers, try SW Union UK, Decrim Now, SWARM, a SWer breakfast or collective)
Also consider giving feedback on local authority (such as councils in the UK) licensing consultations – this can be done completely anonymously in the UK at least
Balance all of this with an understanding that in a way, life can be randomly unfair and unexpected no matter what job you do or who you are, so also allowing that to be in the landscape of your awareness without getting overly attuned to it – working at this can help overall wellbeing

5 – Beware of burn out

Financial anxiety, emotional dysregulation, disrupted routines, needing to rush to make money, perhaps not having time to sit and process a massive life event – this is a recipe for burn out. If you can’t take a break right now, can you take 20 minutes a day to do something to switch off? Or schedule some time off in a month
However you manage it, make sure you don’t let everything compound because then you may find yourself in a much worse situation emotionally, physically or in life in general

(This was first run in National Ugly Mug’s ‘Under the Red Umbrella’ zine, Issue 8 – November 2025 )